So... it has been a long time since I have written a blog. My mind is so full of the "not so good stuff" lately that to take the time to write is overwhelming.
But, something has been on my heart for a while now and it is time for me to let it out and hope that you understand where I am coming from.
I am talking about heroines today, in our day and age, who are they for our girls'? Who is strong, loving, nurturing? Someone you would leave your children with? Other than us parents, who is going to join this village of girl raising to make sure we have a better, more satisfied, fulfilled, and esteemed future leaders, mothers, sisters, etc...?
In this Western world of reality shows and talk shows, heralding the elite and privileged women of Hollywood, who can our girls look up to? I am not going to name them. Oh how I wish I could, but I don't want to giev them the satisfaction of being '"recognized" for anything again. But everyone knows who they are, the hotel daughters, the entertainers(?) married to rappers, the ones who can't seem to keep their clothes on, much less appear to be able to get out of a bed without having some sort of erotic seizure. Why in the world are we looking up to these women? Why are we telling our girls, "You should become like her, see how strong she is, how FIERCE she is?" That is such a crock. If you had a family member who acted like this, the last thing you would want is for your daughters' to be around that. She would be the one who's invitation to a family get together got "lost in the mail", who's Facebook you hide, the one you are always making excuses for, but as soon as she starts making millions of dollars for her actions, then she is a hero? Really? Honestly? There are soooo many women that are not on television or in the public eye that should be heralded. Women who stand up for what they truly believe in, who live to make others feel wanted, loved, absolved, who have been broken like us and who have survivec and thrived and lived to not only tell their story, but be able to help these girls get through their own stories, and survive and thrive.
There is a story about a person being stuck in a hole, a doctor walks by, shakes his head sadly and says, "you will get sick if you sit in there much longer", writes out a prescription and drops it in the hole, a man of the cloth walks by, sees you, shakes his head sadly and says a prayer over you, then a friend walks by and jumps in the hole with you. You are stunned, you say, "Why did you jump in this hole with me?, now we are both stuck!", and your friend says, "It is okay, I have been in this hole before, I know the way out."
Not only do I want to KNOW that friend, I want to BE that friend, I also want to know that there are women out there that are ready to jump in that hole for MY girls, that are willing to take and use the resources they have that most of us don't, and let our girls climb out of that hole dust themselves off and completely shine when they get to the top!!
I want women(me included)that will show all of our daughters not only how to get out of that hole, but to hold themselves up high enough that they won't fall in there to begin with.
This is frustrating, am I making myself clear? I don't feel like I am explaining myself well enough. It makes me so angry when I see these girls emulate what they see, what they hear. Why do we give in? As mothers, aunts, grandmother's, why do we do this to our girls? How do we stop?
We are all broken, we are all damaged in some way or another, but if we keep letting our girls idolize these women, they will be forever damaged and broken, with no one willing to get into the hole with them because no one will know the way out. That is my biggest fear.
But, something has been on my heart for a while now and it is time for me to let it out and hope that you understand where I am coming from.
I am talking about heroines today, in our day and age, who are they for our girls'? Who is strong, loving, nurturing? Someone you would leave your children with? Other than us parents, who is going to join this village of girl raising to make sure we have a better, more satisfied, fulfilled, and esteemed future leaders, mothers, sisters, etc...?
In this Western world of reality shows and talk shows, heralding the elite and privileged women of Hollywood, who can our girls look up to? I am not going to name them. Oh how I wish I could, but I don't want to giev them the satisfaction of being '"recognized" for anything again. But everyone knows who they are, the hotel daughters, the entertainers(?) married to rappers, the ones who can't seem to keep their clothes on, much less appear to be able to get out of a bed without having some sort of erotic seizure. Why in the world are we looking up to these women? Why are we telling our girls, "You should become like her, see how strong she is, how FIERCE she is?" That is such a crock. If you had a family member who acted like this, the last thing you would want is for your daughters' to be around that. She would be the one who's invitation to a family get together got "lost in the mail", who's Facebook you hide, the one you are always making excuses for, but as soon as she starts making millions of dollars for her actions, then she is a hero? Really? Honestly? There are soooo many women that are not on television or in the public eye that should be heralded. Women who stand up for what they truly believe in, who live to make others feel wanted, loved, absolved, who have been broken like us and who have survivec and thrived and lived to not only tell their story, but be able to help these girls get through their own stories, and survive and thrive.
There is a story about a person being stuck in a hole, a doctor walks by, shakes his head sadly and says, "you will get sick if you sit in there much longer", writes out a prescription and drops it in the hole, a man of the cloth walks by, sees you, shakes his head sadly and says a prayer over you, then a friend walks by and jumps in the hole with you. You are stunned, you say, "Why did you jump in this hole with me?, now we are both stuck!", and your friend says, "It is okay, I have been in this hole before, I know the way out."
Not only do I want to KNOW that friend, I want to BE that friend, I also want to know that there are women out there that are ready to jump in that hole for MY girls, that are willing to take and use the resources they have that most of us don't, and let our girls climb out of that hole dust themselves off and completely shine when they get to the top!!
I want women(me included)that will show all of our daughters not only how to get out of that hole, but to hold themselves up high enough that they won't fall in there to begin with.
This is frustrating, am I making myself clear? I don't feel like I am explaining myself well enough. It makes me so angry when I see these girls emulate what they see, what they hear. Why do we give in? As mothers, aunts, grandmother's, why do we do this to our girls? How do we stop?
We are all broken, we are all damaged in some way or another, but if we keep letting our girls idolize these women, they will be forever damaged and broken, with no one willing to get into the hole with them because no one will know the way out. That is my biggest fear.